Creepers

I work at a Car rental agency-and I'm often the only one in the office at night.  There is a night lot attendant but he's usually busy in the back w/the cars or at the airport with the cars.  So, seeming completely alone, some customers think they can take the oppoutunity to have some fun and make jokes that wouldn't be made if another person were around.  It makes me angry.

Today was one such day.  Its the first customer of the day too-Cornelius.  He come in with a Friend, I don't know his name so we'll call him Mr. Stupid-but Mr Stupid was only here because he was the friend  to bring
Cornelius to pick up the rental car.

Anyways, so I'm standing behind the counter at the computer entering all of Cornelius' info from his drivers license, and apparently Mr Stupid is smiling because Corny here says "Awwww look at that, you're making him smile."

I think...uhhh.....excuse me?

"Your making him smile" corny says again

I could see where this was going, and I quickly was very glad that I have a boyfriend-makes it really easy to tell someone why I'm not going to give them my number

Then Mr Stupid says "For reals...*something somthing* but I'd love to have your number."

uhhhhhg I knew it......  So I kindly say with an aw-dang-it-curtesy-smile, "I'm sorry, but I'm in a relationship-your flattering, but sorry."   Then they kept at it-during the entire rental. I'm serious, now that I think about it, I was only at the very beggining of the process entering how many days the rental would be when they started their shenanigans.   He continued to ask my name-I told him the truth though in hindsight I should have given a fake name-becaues then I could have laughed at them-Heres how that part of the convo went:
Mr Stupid: "Whats your name anyways?"
Me: "Melanie"
Corny:  "I knew it-it had to be Melody or peggy or somethinglike dat"
Me:  "It's MelaKNEE"
Corny: "Oh-well we're gonna have to change that right here and now, because you've got a song about you here"

in my head:      ....uhhh.....

There was another point before that that Mr Stupid said I looked like spongebob-then they tried to play it off as a compliment.  Corny said "who works at a car rental just up the street" to the tune of the spongebob song "Who lives in a pineapple under the sea"    ...That actually was kinda funny/creative.  He msut use it alot.

And when I was at the payment screen Mr Stupid asked if I was a gemini.  Again in my head: ....uhhhh....
So I told him no, I'm a saggitarius, and asked why-can't remember his answer but then I told him I don't really follow those anyways....I Hope he felt dumb.

So finally, the worst part-I hit the print button and then have to walk away from the counter to get the papers-as I walk back (not making eye contact) Corny says again, "I knew it, I knew it I knew it."

"knew what?" I ask  (<---stupid question)

"You've got an apple bottom"

o_O

In my head:  AHHHHHH!!!!!  GET THEM OUT OF HERE!!!!

Then they said my a** was fine and I stopped listening and went into auto mode trying to get them to sign the papers as fast as I could and praying that there isn't anymore damage on the car so they can just leave!!!!

It was horrible!